Good evening interweb! I am writing and exposing my cliched pain out into the ether. Perhaps you will commiserate with me. Perhaps you may provide some of your fermented wisdom. Perhaps you will join me and shout, “fuck it all!”. Either way, I am here for it.
Tonight I decided that I will blog my journey as I venture into the unknown of becoming a divorced, single, mom. Now, at the moment I am separated from my partner – unwillingly so (wah, was, I still love him!) and I am not sure what the future holds all I know is… I am depressed. Confused. Pissed. Relieved. Hurt. Girl (or boy, or non conforming), you name it!
So alas, shall I begin…
Today, marks day one of my technically being a single mom. I am home ALONE. I had to feed my girls, ALONE. I had to get my girls to bed, ALONE. I had to make sure MY home was safe before I dared to have a moment to myself, ALONE. I had to spread myself precariously thin as I divided my attention between my four-year old and my seven-month old. Sigh, I am spent. Frankly, it was all a bit overwhelming and I find myself somewhat numb. I’ve done all of the above by myself before, many a time (too many in fact), and yet… Something was different.